One thing I catch myself saying a lot is “I have to protect my energy.” Protecting my energy and watching the people around me has become very important to me in recent years. I realized to receive and exude positive energy I must release and get rid of the negative energy around and inside me first, so that meant some people and things had to go.


The energy that I am referring to is more of a mental energy. That energy that makes you feel like today is going to be a good day until Tracy comes around complaining about her boyfriend that’s she’s not going to leave for the 100th time, or that friend who doesn’t understand why nobody likes them while they’re gossiping about everybody else in the same breath. This is the type of energy I choose not to be around the complainers, Debbie downers, nothing is good about my life whiners and the most annoying of them all negative Nancy’s.

A lot of times people forget that energy is transferring. Simply engaging in someone’s negative anger can have you yelling at your husband all because Tracy’s man is not acting right. This type of energy is everywhere and at times unavoidable. We tend to keep toxic people in our lives all because they’re family or you’ve been friends for 20 years but last time I checked toxic is toxic no matter how long it has been in your life. Eventually we have to come to a point in our lives and ask how do we remove this type of energy, how do we get rid of the bad apples.


Not engaging is the number one way to protect your energy from toxic people. With doing that people can make you feel like you’re being mean or vice versa while also telling you you’ve changed. Learning how to conduct yourself when around bad energy is always uncomfortable at first.  Ridding people of negative energy is not always easy. What if they are family and you have to see them every day or the relationship is bigger than their negative energy and you just wish they could make some tweaks and all would be fine. In these type of instances, I like to use what I call directive energy.

When a conversation is going in a negative light I like to direct the energy to where it needs to go, I do this by changing the subject or finding the bright side of what they are complaining about. After a few times of directing energy to a more positive light most people will get the picture and realize you do not wish to engage in those type of conversations. Now if any of this energy is coming from your mom and if your mom is anything like mine do not take any of this advice just shut up, look stupid and listen. No one in their right mind would have the courage to stop her ranting (haha).

We live in a day and age where bad energy does not have to stand in front of you and say hello, it’s now on your phone with more access than ever and they call it social media.


We come in contact with more negative energy on our phones then we will ever experience in person especially with social media. Social media has become the driving force to depression, social anxiety, negative energy and so much more all because of who we follow. I am very particular about who I follow, if your page does not exude some type of positive energy I gotta let you go. The fake and nothing is good about my life people I gotta let you go. Energy is transferring even through a phone. I make a strong point to follow people who are inspiring, positive and fun so that when I scroll through my timeline I’m saying awww, that’s looks fun oppose to ugh or here we go again.

Like everybody else I use social media to be nosey like we all do. I want to see what’s happening in people’s lives, but if every post is about you in pain or something is going wrong you need a therapist not social media and if social media is the only outlet you can afford that’s ok too as it’s ok for me to unfollow you. The same way your block game is strong I need your follow game to be just as strong. It is ok to not follow Tracy back, you already have to deal with her at work…is that not enough.


I know you all are thinking like what if the tea is really hot… I mean baby its whistling!  Do I still supposed to walk away and not engage? My answer, absolutely not, get that tea sis but know how much you should drink, a few sips here and there won’t hurt anyone but nobody told you to drink the whole cup and start sharing it with everybody nor letting it affect your positive energy.

As humans we all need to vent, life is not always peaches and cream and we all need someone who will just listen to get things off our chest, but when your venting turns into character defaming or just down right nasty I gotta let you go. Yes I do wanna hear about how Tracy finally left her man(Tracy need a journey haha) but when telling me how she finally stood up for herself turns into “she’s a dumb bitch I would never put up with that” I have to walk away. Get your tea by all means but to tear down another person in the process is not the type of energy I need in my life.

We all go through stuff and at times we are the bad energy, that’s why it is so important to have good positive people around you. When you are having a bad day they’re there to help direct your energy and not feed the negative energy. Also remember your self-awareness, people will not always be around to help bring you back to the light. One of the ways I direct my own energy is through music, reading and yoga, these things really help me decompress and refocus to find my light of energy mentally. As much as you can be that positive light of energy and help direct the energy of others never forget to protect the most important energy your own. Negative energy is everywhere, that we cannot control, but what we do with that energy is mainly up to our own discretion.

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